“The most valuable gifts have no price tag.”- Braden

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Our daughter, Caitlin’s 18th birthday is on Christmas Eve. These two giving occasions coincide each year and especially now that she’s no longer a child, we’re running out of gift ideas. Thankfully, she’s always thoughtful to provide us with a wishlist!

We posted this last year but thought it timely to reshare. Maybe a new reader could use it this Christmas season or others may need a reminder. I certainly do.

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Recently, a young mom at my office asked BradensVoice to contribute an article on parenting for their company newsletter. I thought a lot about how to provide something of use for new parents just beginning their journey. The article needed to be brief yet practical. The question kept coming to mind: If Cathy and I were new parents today, wouldn’t it be helpful to have a list of do’s and don’ts from others who had insights from their own experiences?

Each Christmas season, most of us form wishlists for our children, hoping to surprise them with something they’ll treasure and maybe even use for awhile. Even with our best intentions, most will be discarded once the gifts are opened and the new has become worn. I began to consider what all children might ask for if they could get something that could remain with them always.

Arriving at the office that morning, I quickly began writing down thoughts before they faded. Later, our daughter reviewed the list for edits and to remove anything she felt didn’t fit the criteria. Our list is certainly not all-inclusive and each parent will have unique edits or additions. That is as it should be. Forming such a written list has been humbling to this parent. Still, taking stock helps and we all learn as we go. That’s an important part of the job.

Our prayer in this season of giving is that readers might choose one or two of these free gift ideas to give away to those we love the most.

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Mom and dad, these are things we really NEED… love, your kids

Faith and Family

Walk consistently in your faith. We’re watching to see if the rules you follow on Sunday still apply on Monday.

Help us to personally know Jesus and to discern the difference between religion about Him vs. relationship with Him.

Encourage us to become active in a youth group and help us find the right one. We need a support group of peers who share our faith as we navigate our teenage years.

Sing out loud in church because we’re watching. If what the preacher says is such “Good News”, shouldn’t you be really happy about it?

Time and Connection

We can sometimes feel alone and out of touch in our world, so never stop giving us your hugs and kisses, even when we squirm or complain.

Make a priority of family time over work time. Both are important but not equal.

Have fun and be silly sometimes – laughter is the best painkiller.

Wisdom

We will eventually realize you didn’t have all the right answers, but we’ll always be grateful you helped us to learn from mistake and grow in wisdom.

Teach us about keeping healthy boundaries against the world’s temptations and toxic people.

Help us learn how to choose our friends because they will influence our future.

Remind us that our identity is not determined by anything or anyone other than our Creator.

Let us know there is a difference between reacting and responding.

Communication

Let us know that no subject is taboo, no matter how uncomfortable it may feel. If we can’t work through our questions with you, we’ll look for answers elsewhere.

Listen at least twice as long you speak.

In conflict, we’re the kids, so you be the adult.

Try not to curse – language is primarily learned by hearing.

You are our mirrors, so reflect what you want to see in us.

Security

Build and maintain a healthy marriage. It won’t happen without work and you may need to ask for some help.

As our parents, please share the same map. We’ll be confused with two conflicted navigators.

Believe in us even when we disappoint you, because we will.

Create and keep family traditions – They make us feel secure.

In arguments, remember our walls are thinner than you think. Let us see you make up so we can know that families will disagree, but that’s ok.

When we leave to make our own home, keep a place for us in yours.

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This list isn’t complete, but the most important thing to emphasize to any parent, new or old? Children are their parents’ most valuable gifts, but we only get to hold them for a brief moment. Enjoy the time and make the most of it! 🎁

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‘Start children off the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it. ‘ – Proverbs 22:6